(no subject)

Did you ever see Kurt and Courtney? It's a rotten movie, but worth watching just for some of the freaks they interview, like Courtney Love's scary father and the infamous El Duce of the Mentors. El Duce was funny as hell. Too bad he got hit by a train. (Check out that last link; I particularly like the sentence that reads, "His death was the result of being hit by a train in a state of alcoholic intoxication.")

(no subject)

There's fried rice all over the floor in the men's room. I don't even want to know.

hot breasts and manowar musings

You can take the boy out of the South, but . . . I hardly ever eat fried chicken, but every once in a while I get a powerful hankerin' for it. I've been craving it for days, so I finally went to Popeye's tonight and scored some spicy breasts and cajun rice. I still can't believe they have Popeye's chicken up here, but I'm very glad. Still no Waffle Houses, though . . .

I was feeling all triumphant after Friday's good news, so I busted out the Manowar CDs and went driving. Manowar is -- oh, how best to describe them? Let's see . . . well, most of their album covers look a lot like this:



and the band looks something like this:



and, I'm afraid, most of the band's fans look a great deal like this guy (the old one):



If you haven't guessed by now, I'll let you in on a little secret: Manowar plays heavy metal. Yes, it's true. And most of Manowar's songs are about -- well, heavy metal. They're known for such chestnuts as "Metal Daze" and "Kings of Metal."

They're probably the dumbest band in the world (except for, you know, The Moldy Peaches), but I just can't shake them. I'll go a couple of years without listening to them and think it's finally over, but then, when I least expect it, I'll inexplicably pull out Fighting the World and rock out to some "Black Wind, Fire, and Steel." And suddenly I'm sixteen again -- pounding my fist and headbanging like a fool. Manowar is really good at making people act like fools. One day in 1994, I came home from work to the sounds of Manowar blaring throughout the house. I walked into the dining room, and there was my roommate standing in front of a full-length mirror and performing his best rock-star poses. If I had been the cruel sort, I would have told all our friends, but I couldn't do that. I understood.

Weird side note: Orson Welles did speaking parts for a couple of Manowar songs. It's true. He was allegedly a Manowar fan, but I find that a little hard to believe. He probably did those songs while in the same dire financial straits that reduced him to doing those Gallo wine commercials.