wickedflea | (no subject)

This morning I woke up with a start and could not figure out what day it was. I couldn't figure out if I had to work today or not. Finally I figured out, OK, it's Tuesday (ugh), yes, I have to work. I wish I could have convinced myself it was Saturday. It was a good thing I woke up when I did, though, because when I looked over at the clock I realized that I'd forgotten to turn the alarm on. It's weird how you can do that and still wake up more or less on time. Kinda scary, really--like the clock has such a hold over you that it works even when it's not on. *cue Lard's "I Am Your Clock" here*

Anyway. I'm in a pretty good mood these days. My bonus really came at a good time and allowed me to crawl out of a couple of holes I was in, and that's a relief for sure. Maybe the raise will help me stay out of such holes in the future. Right.

I have taken this opportunity to jump back on the cable-TV bandwagon. I made it through the summer without it, but missing one round of the baseball playoffs was too much for me--I had to get reconnected. Cable guy's coming tomorrow. I feel so weak. Pity the poor addict.

nonamejane and I have planned to go see School of Rock this weekend if we can coordinate the logistics. I am as happy as a little girl. :)

My chrisheller.net mail is working again, but Eudora still insists on downloading multiple copies of each message several times a day. I'm wearing a hole in the delete key.

Oh, I almost forgot. There's an old man here in New Haven who's infamous for engaging people in difficult conversations on the street and being very rude. I've written about him before. But I'm always afraid to tell him to jump in the lake because I'm afraid he'll flip out and bust some septugenarian Shaq-Fu on my ass. Everybody I've spoken to about him has had similar experiences: he starts making small talk with them and soon gets all confrontational. But lately I've gotten my revenge. One day late last week I saw him walking down the street as I passed in my car, so I yelled, "FUCKHEAD!" He stopped and stared like he couldn't believe his ears, and I laughed my monkey ass off. But the really great thing is that yesterday I was pulling into the parking lot by the press and I saw him again, so naturally again I yelled "FUCKHEAD!" And this time he stopped and walked back the other direction for a bit so he could try to get a good look at me. But I was low riding as I always do on the Yale campus, so he'll never be able to recognize me when I run into him again. I got a little scared right after I pulled into the lot, because for a minute I thought he was going to come after me. I sped to the back of the lot and hoped he didn't pursue me; for a minute I had horrible visions of having to bolt from the car and flee the scene. I'm not quite as spry as I used to be, so I have no doubt that the old coot could run me down. He decided to have pity on my punk ass, however, and spared me.

Yes, I'm aware that it's probably not the coolest thing in the world to go around shouting obscenities at senior citizens. But ya gotta understand--this guy is a major asshole. I'd probably get a commendation from the mayor if my good deeds were publicized. But I don't do it for the accolades--I do it for the good of humanity. And besides, I just think it'll be really cool when I next see him at the bus stop and he starts in about how the whole country is going to hell in a handbasket. I can look right at him and say, "Yeah! You know, there's a bunch of little son of a bitches who drive around in cars and call me 'fuckhead,' can you believe that?!?" It'll be soooo nice when he looks at me with that same look of shock that he's given me twice on the street as he tries to sort the whole thing out in his head.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

where does this guy usually hang out? i have no compunction about obscenities directed toward the scary old people in new haven who hang out. at least the men probably don't make sexual comments to you! some old man told me he'd like to whip me as i passed by. he got an obscenity. assholes, all of them.

Usually I see him at the bus stop across from the Gap, on the opposite corner from Claire's. He has a white beard, glasses, and usually a blue baseball cap. I don't think he's homeless or anything--just kind of a crackpot, I guess.

Some guy said he wanted to WHIP you?!? Good night, that's scary stuff--I don't blame ya for the obscenity. But of course he proably likes it when young girls talk dirty to him. :/

I bet he'd be happier if he ate lard.

Indeed. Lard = big heaping piles of happiness.

"I am as happy as a little girl. :)" <- Does that make me a pedophile?

sorry forgot to log in, that was me...

WHEW. Don't scare me like that--for a second I was trying to figure out who might be stalking me!

Hey, whatever floats your boat--I'm not complaining. :) BTW, have you seen my pink dress?

Yes I have and if I do say so myself, you's sure is a very pretty lady... ;-)

Were you out of Fig Newtons? ;)

YES, can you believe it?!? And he would have been the PERFECT target!

Thank you for the late Tuesday afternoon cackle : D

Happy (belated, I think) Birthday!!!

Thanks much! :)

Besides being a funny ass story, just the fact that you used the phrase "go jump in the lake" makes you endearing as hell.

Awww, thanks. =) You know I learned everything I know from Charles Schulz!

You and me both, kiddo.