found in my cart at Target

[wickedflea]

Comments

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

I'm just stoked that they came out with a diet version!

[lulu-girl.livejournal.com]

LOLOLOL

ew

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

hahahaha, I have no idea what that means

[lulu-girl.livejournal.com]

You have no idea what filth my mind created. I'll be nice and not share.

[rheyamorgaine.livejournal.com]

Share! Share!

[rheyamorgaine.livejournal.com]

LOL guess he's well hung as well as hungry

[lulu-girl.livejournal.com]

I like how the underlined MAGNUMS. The person must have written this list for someone else...or so I would hope. Otherwise, dude is just wicked vain.



edited because my god, I need to proofread

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

I'll bet it was some wicked vain dude making the list out for his woman. GET ME SOME CUMM-PLETES AND SOME MAGNUMS FOR MY BIG BAD PEENIS THAT I'M GONNA ROGER YOU WITH. AND CEREAL.

[lulu-girl.livejournal.com]

UGH
UGH
UGH
'roger' for whatever reason that work usage creeps me out. D:

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

It is kinda cringeworthy. I wish I hadn't just packed my American lit anthology, cuz there's a piece in it by some early colonist that I always remember. It has all these excerpts from this dude's diary, and it's filled with stuff like: "Planted corn. Rode horse all afternoon. Came home. Rogered the maid. Praise be to God!"

[rheyamorgaine.livejournal.com]

*LOL* Planted corn? Hmmm wasn't that what he was doing when he rogered the maid, praise god? And that poor horse! Wait, the poor maid, she got sloppy seconds! (I mean really, he "rode the horse all afternoon")

ETA btw I laughed so hard I almost shot raspberry white tea out of my nose

[rufus.livejournal.com]

oh god, oh god, I know that one. william byrd, maybe? he danced his dance every morning, too?

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

YES! God, I'm so glad you knew that. It woulda bugged me all night!

[carocrow.livejournal.com]

I'm glad you remembered it too, because that is probably one of the best bits of American Literature and it was stuck in the back of my brain like a popcorn husk.

[rheyamorgaine.livejournal.com]

Yes as in, I need the magnums not the "Beyond Seven" ones ;)

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

HAW!

[lulu-girl.livejournal.com]

what
the
fuck
?

Please tell me you found this on your windshield or something.

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

In the cart I used at Target! I'm glad it wasn't on my windshield. I'd have been afeared that it was from my mulleted nemesis.

[lulu-girl.livejournal.com]

HAHAHAH

And how fitting. "Target"

bulls eye! ew

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

LOLOL

[buscemi.livejournal.com]

I bet the guy who wrote that is overcompensating (or just showing off). Hee.

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

He probably wrote the list for himself. :D

[ginamoog.livejournal.com]

jesus.

[ginamoog.livejournal.com]

we should start a 'leave lists in grocery carts' flash mob or something.

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

Totally! We come up with some crazy shit that'd have investigators flocking to the supermarket in no time.

[4hour-ramona.livejournal.com]

oh good, you found my dayplanner.

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

NOW WHERE'S MY BISCUITS

[4hour-ramona.livejournal.com]

oh look, someone else found my wedding photos - http://www.gwinnettdailypost.com/print.asp?SectionID=6&SubSectionID=84&ArticleID=16944

[theodicy.livejournal.com]

I thought that cum had 10 cal./tsp. That's really a lot, when you start adding it up.

Which I am NOT DOING.

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

GRACK. My brain immediately starting thinking, whoa, how much would that be per gallon?

*scrubs brain*

[rheyamorgaine.livejournal.com]

btw I have to link to this in my journal

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

SHARE THE LOVE :D

[rheyamorgaine.livejournal.com]

<3 my Heller

[tangled-rhythms.livejournal.com]

I'm here because she put the link in her journal and I have to say that I laughed so hard that I nearly hurt myself. Being Southern, I have to admit that I've met people who would have written out such a list. Course, those people also usually didn't have teeth, wore their baseball hat without a bill, and had shrines to NASCAR drivers in their living rooms.

I'm Southern, so I can get away with saying those things :)

[jetjet.livejournal.com]

hahahahahaaha, the MERE fact that person wrote that he NEEDS magnums means he doesn't actually have that big of a "ego"
hahahaha

[shlorp.livejournal.com]

That is awesome.

[aithne-fae.livejournal.com]

I added you, cause rheyamorgaine said she'd share..*nods and grins*

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

I'm nothin' if not shareable. :D Good to meet you!

[aithne-fae.livejournal.com]

Nice to meet you also!:)

[hah-sone.livejournal.com]

I think a female wrote this list. No self-respecting man would ever purchase 100-calorie packs. I also wonder what sort of male would include condoms on a shopping list, even if he intended to buy some. At the various points in my life at which I have needed such items, I seldom FORGOT that I needed them whilst shopping for my eggs and biscuits. In fact: What would I be doing buying eggs and biscuits if I needed some condoms? Restaurants make food. Let's get on back to the house!

I say: The man who needs Magnums is not likely to be on a diet, or even making sack lunches for himself. That man would be a fool to be fat, and he has women (or effeminate little men) to make him lunch.

And this man also wears Cum-Pleats, a special stain-resistant trouser for day-to-day emergencies.

This list was composed by a hopeful mate, eager to prepare him or herself by dieting and improving his or her personal bodily aroma. She will fix this well-endowed man a hearty breakfast of eggs, biscuits and cereal with milk, and drinks as well. He or she will present this breakfast alongside a gift of new slacks, and fling him or herself at him, desperately tearing into the large box of magnums and pleading for service.

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

Positively Ignatian, sir. Well done. :D

Goats

[hah-sone.livejournal.com]

Gots many new goat pictures for you.

I was on vacation in NC, not far from the Carl Sandburg home. As you may know, Sandburg had a goat farm (which is still maintained today, and may be toured).

This year is some sort of anniversary of that place. Either the anniversary of the author, or something he did. Maybe the establishment of the farm, I dunno.

Anyway: This little town up there usually has an annual community art project centered around bears, cause there are lots of bears up there. They decorate these big fiberglass bears in crazy ways.

Well, this year, in honor of the Sandburg anniversary, they decorated goats instead. These goats (as is the tradition with the bears) line the Main Street of the town during business hours.

Because I know you have a thing for goats, I walked up one side and down the other side of Main Street and took pictures of every one of those goats.

They'll be 'shopped and ready this weekend. You will be amused.

JAH

Re: Goats

[hah-sone.livejournal.com]

Dang, I thought that was an email.
Ooops. It's in public now.

Re: Goats

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

Kick ass--can't wait! :D