(no subject)

Phleuh. I woke up a little while ago having to go to the bathroom, and now I can't sleep. I even thought about just getting up and going to work to get a jump on some things. But if I show up there four hours early with a fresh haircut, somebody's going to think I've lost my mind and have me taken away to the banana barn. And I can't have that, cuz the vonny sods would never let me out if they ever got their rookers on me.

(no subject)

Behold this shocking gallery of Weight Watchers recipe cards from 1974. My mom was a Weight Watchers lecturer (or whatever they call them) back in those days, so it's possible that we even had some of these atrocities in our house. The cards, I mean. I can't imagine her ever actually making any of this crap.

(no subject)

This is the kind of mail I get to open from time to time:

Dear Sir/Madam:

I would like to take this opportinity to Introduce myself and also to tell you a little about my background.

I am a college student, majoring in Computer Information Systems and I also have a Bachelor of Arts in History.

My hobbies include reading (books on the Civil War, World War 1 & 2, Westerns, Computer self-help books, Revolutionary War, Plains Indian, Indian History and the old West), I also like to watch and play (football, baseball, basketball), and collect sports cards.

Currently, I desire a postion as a freelance reader with a reputable publishing company such as yous, and I would like to speak to you regarding the availibility of such a position with your firm.

I can be reached by e-mail at: blah@hotmail.com.

Thank you for taking the time out of your busy schedule to evaluate my qualifications.

I knew it was going to be one of those letters from the handwriting on the envelope--it had special ed written all over it.

Hmmmmm, I hope people don't assume I'm the arthritic eight-year-old I must appear to be from my handwriting. I guess that's one reason I type envelopes for professional mail I send.

(no subject)

[Poll #269244]

(no subject)

Whoo hoo! They're building a Quizno's right down the street. I've never been to one, but them sammiches look pretty good. And they got a pepper bar! And I'll bet those guitar-playin' rats make for some pretty fine eatin'.