(no subject)

[wickedflea]

I just went to get my car to move it into the parking lot, and on my way around the block, I happened to notice a Yale kid ambling down the sidewalk. And I just happened to have a fig newton in my hand. So naturally I rolled down the window and chunked it at him. I didn't quite hit him, but it bounced off the hood of the car parked next to him and landed at his feet. In the rear-view mirror I saw him looking back and forth between my car and the newton.

Some of you might frown on this seemingly childish behavior, but think of it this way: I've given him something that will last the rest of his life. He'll be telling his grandchildren about the time some joker chunked a fig newton at him. Some people volunteer or donate money to charities; I do my part with acts of idiocy.

(You may have noticed my use of the word "chunked" (not "chucked"). I think that's a Southernism that may in fact be peculiar to my family, and maybe just my aunt. Come to think of it, there are a lot of things peculiar to my family.)

Comments

[buscemi.livejournal.com]

You didn't have a dog ball handy, I'm guessing.

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

Nope, I think they were all under the seat, and I didn't have a chance to fumble around for it, so I had to go with what I had. Carpe diem, y'know.

[buscemi.livejournal.com]

What's latin for "seize the fig"?

[cierrablue.livejournal.com]

You are my hero.

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

You can do it too! It only takes $1.49 and the dedication deep in your heart to pegging the shit out of innocent bystanders.

[katesutor.livejournal.com]

Hahahaha! That was great! Funny shit! Thanks for making me laugh!

Re:

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

Thanks, my pleasure! :)

[zoe.livejournal.com]

whats up with your huckin' newtons at the yalies? Huh?

Re:

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

You know you'd be right here with me zingin' little Muffys and Brandons with newtons if you could Come on out, I swear it'd be a blast!

Re: Oh really?

[zoe.livejournal.com]

Could I sit on the hood of the car at least with a coffee slurpee? NOW that would be great!

Sloth love Chunk

[dangerpest.livejournal.com]

I once went out with this girl from florida who used the word "Chunk" in place of the ubiquitous "Chuck". God I hope you two were'nt related (you never know with you southerners) she would bring much shame to your family.

-p

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

So you're the one who defiled Thelma. They're looking for you down in the Everglades, but I won't rat you out. I never got on too well with that part of the Family.

[lunchboxface.livejournal.com]

Not just your family, we used to say "chunked" all the time - especially when committing similar acts of hijinkery.

Re:

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

OK, good--I thought it was common, but then I tried to think of who I'd heard saying it, and the only person I could think of was my aunt.

Good, though. Good. Sometime I'll regale you with tales of chunking rocks at cars.

[notmyworld.livejournal.com]

it's all fun and games with the fig newtons until mr. yale gets his skulls buddies to make it so you can never land a job in corporate america again... or something.

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

Yikes, that's actually pretty scary! Tom Ridge himself will probably be showing up at my apt. in no time...

Re:

[notmyworld.livejournal.com]

and don't forget his skull buddy Dubya.

[deadflowers.livejournal.com]

okay, you need to stop. just yesterday i noticed how i prefer chunked over chucked and wondered if it's a southern thing.

get outta my head.

[wickedflea.livejournal.com]

Yikes, scary indeed!